Friday, October 26, 2018

Problems Welcome; Bring Solutions!

 A vice-president of a large corporation I worked at years ago had a sign on his door that read, "Problems welcome; Bring solutions!"  He was basically in charge of solving problems, but he wanted you to have carefully vet out the problem and offer possible solutions -- not just complain about it.

In that spirit, here's my solution to the "caravan" that's peacefully approaching our border and asking politely if they can come in (or storming the castle walls -- depending on which news channel your watch):

Step 1) Hold a special election with a simple, one-question ballot: "Do you believe that the individuals in the caravan should be allowed into the United States?"  Vote Yes or No.

Step 2) All those who voted "NO" will be given a bold red, white, and blue "I voted today" sticker. 

Step 3) Congratulations to all those who voted "YES"!  All those who voted "YES" will be visited by a U.S. Government Agency and their home(s) assessed.  That agency will determine how many rooms you have in your home that are not being occupied.  Obviously, you get to keep your bedroom and any bedrooms the rest of your family is using, but the rest of the rooms will be set up for your new friends that you voted to come to stay with you -- say, four friends per room. 

Step 4)  Churches will also be assessed and new friends dropped off for you to host (if you choose not to participate, you will lose your tax-exempt status).  TV networks, radio stations, newspapers, magazines, etc.  that editorialize about how unfair it is for keeping these folks out will also be receiving a few busloads. 

Step 5)  You will pay for shelter, clothing, food, and health.  You'll also be responsible for finding them work, and working with them to legally become U.S. Citizens.  For these service you will receive no tax write-offs, no aid, no anything.  Just a good feeling that you're making the U.S. and the world a better place.

Step 6) If one of your friends commits a crime, YOU are an accessory to that crime.  You may have to serve some jail time, but the good news is that it frees up a room in your home for more from the caravan.

Step 7)  Each time you successfully release one of your friends into the U.S. as legal U.S. Citizens, you will be assigned new friends until there just aren't anymore. 

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So, there you have it.  My solution to the "caravan" problem. 


Ready to vote?

Carpe diem Life,
David Kuhn

P.S.  The vice-president I spoke of earlier was fired after everyone realized that he himself never offered any solutions of his own.  Sort of sounds like a lot of talking heads on TV these days.  Just sayin'.

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