A Series of Unfortunate Events

Sometimes, you can tell a lot by how a story is going to progress and end by the opening line.  For example, stories that begin, “Once upon a time . . . “ usually have a fairy book ending.  On the other hand, stories that being, “We thought it would be a good idea to . . .” end, well, read on.

It was a gorgeous Autumn day, so we thought it would be a good idea to wash curtains and clean windows.  To knock the chill off the house we kicked up the heat a little.  That’s when the smoke alarm went off.  The perfume of burning plastic hit us.  We quickly shut down the heater and quickly assessed the situation.  After a thorough search, we found no flames or smoke.  We figured that it might just be the first time the heater was on for the season.  We hope.

Next, curtains.  Took them down and loaded the washing mashing.  Those of you who actually read this blog might remember that this is a NEW machine because of a fiasco early this year (spoiler alert, the machine performed perfectly — this time).

Windows.  These are those tilt-in, easy to clean replacement windows.  And they are tilt-in. And they are easy to clean.  And they will shatter if, while closing one, the one next to it tilts wide open and crashes against the wall.  The sound of a shattering glass explosion is unmistakable.  Suzanne rushed in to witness the carnage.  Thankfully, no injuries.

 So, while Suzanne went upstairs to find the paperwork on the replacement windows, I went to the closet to get a broom.  That’s when I walked past the downstairs bathroom and noticed the toilet overflowing — really overflowing.  I mean really, really overflowing.  Seems that the gallons and gallons of water exiting the washing machine was backing up and out the toilet.  TOWELS! (A problem that we’ve had multiple times through the years — usually on a holiday when family is in and someone is in the shower.)

Have you ever had to call a plumber on Sunday overtime?  I’m not going to say that it’s expensive, but when people try to tell you how expensive something is they use the metaphor, “As expensive as a plumber on Sundays.”

Anyway, Chuck — a very nice guy and seemed to really know his shit — pulled the toilet, brought in some heavy equipment and cleaned out the drain.  At least for now.  “You really need to get someone back to dig that pipe up and see what’s going on!” says Chuck and he drives off into the sunset to live happily ever after.

Suzanne finished the curtains at the laundry mat.  I finished washer a few more windows without incident and spent an extra amount of time cleaning the bathroom floor because, well, you know.
So, no.  This is not one of those, “Once upon a time . . .” stories.  At least not yet.  Window company is on the way out to take a look and the plumber has a ticket in and I need to set up an appointment to have some major work down to fix this crappy plumbing problem once and for all.

This blog started with, “It seemed like a good idea . . . “  In the future when I write about our home maintenance issues, I may use author Lemony Snicket’s line from A Series of Unfortunate Events:
“If you are interested in stories with happy endings, you would be better off reading some other book.”

So, how was your weekend?

Carpe diem Life,
David Kuhn

P.S.
I good exercise in Care Diem, ADPIE, Serenity-Courage-Wisdom . . .